Becoming Aluminum Free

So, I'm going to touch on a subject that most women do not discuss. I'm writing about it because when I talk about it in a "safe environment", I find that it's a common issue that a lot of women face.....underarm sweat. My super close friends and I refer to it as an "Underarm Problem." My husband used to call me "pheromoney". I say "used to" because we have fixed the Underarm Problem.

So let's start at puberty, I noticed it. I used regular deodorant and sometimes I would feel sweat rolling down my underarms. I couldn't really repeat tops after one wear because the underarms would smell sour at the end of the day. Sometimes they would still have a smell after I washed them. I tried Febreeze and other laundry solutions. Nothing worked. So, I just dealt with it. I wasn't insecure about it. I didn't like it but whatever. I'm still cute.

When I went to college, all of the big time deodorant companies started coming out with "Prescription Strength" deodorant. Same issues. Except for now I'd have this film on my armpits. I'd have to scrub them separately to get the film off. SMH. By the time I turned 25 years old, I had tried the under crystals, which broke me out, so I figured out that alternating my deodorants helped. That seemed to work unless I was having a long day. I considered botox under my arms for my wedding but $1200 wasn't in the budget on top of the wedding expenses, so I put botox on the back burner.

I tried Certain Dri and some other underarm gels that claimed to help with sweating. They weren't a good fit for one reason or another. At 32 years old, someone told me about Donna Karan Cashmere Mist deodorant. FINALLY!!! I found something that worked. It was $16 a pop but worth it. I didn't smell sour at the end of the day anymore. I smelled like perfume. It had sooooo much aluminum in it though, 17%. But my clothes would still smell sour in the armpit part. When I got laser hair removal in my underarms, that helped but only temporarily. I also tried a few brands I found in Europe and Sephora. Nope. Right back to Donna Karan. I did figure out that spraying apple cider vinegar on the armpits of my clothes would get rid of that sour smell.

So, here I am, a 35 year old woman who can't get control over her Underarm Problem without spending $25 on deodorant....cuz that Donna Karan price went up every year. SMH. Then one day I had lunch with my cousin and she was telling me that had to have surgery. She was explaining how she knew something was wrong because her underarms had suddenly started stinking and she never had to use deodorant before that. I was jealous about that no deodorant thing but I started thinking. MAYBE, juuuuuuuusssst maybe, my underarm problem could be triggered by all of the crap they put in the deodorants I had been using. I was also pregnant. And you know how crazy pregnant women are about what they put in and on their bodies.

So, I started trying natural deodorants again. First, I tried a direct sales deodorant, it irritated my underarms. Then a fellow Underarm Problem friend recommended Piper Wei, another natural deodorant. AND IT WORKED!!! I was so excited! FINALLY! I had started to notice my underarms getting dark though. I thought it was related to being pregnant, until I stopped using it for a couple days and the darkness cleared up. *sigh* Breaking me out again. Then I realized that most aluminum free deodorant have baking soda as one of the main ingredient. Baking soda was triggering an eczema like reaction on my underarm skin. I knew I couldn't be the only one dealing with this. So the mission began.

I started researching and found that milk of magnesia works well as deodorant. I tried it. It worked. But it was inconvenient. Like, pour it in my hand and spread it. Naw. I ain't 'bout to commit to that. Let me put it in a roll on container. The rest is history. The end result is Fancy Free Deodorant, a roll on, natural deodorant that is aluminum free. My son is 1 year old now, I've been using Fancy Free deodorant over the course of the year. Here is what I noticed a few things:

• My clothes no longer smell sour at the end of the day
• I no longer smelled sour at the end of the day
• I no longer had a deodorant film on my underarm skin that required an extra scrub in the shower
• No yellow stains in the armpits of my white shirts (only the occasional grey smear when I didn't let it dry before I put my clothes on)

So, it WAS the crap in the deodorant making me funky and having me think I needed more deodorant. LOL! Anyway, it took me long enough to get it right but I was able to solve a problem that most women have. 

Visit the Fancy Free Shop to see the full description of all of the ingredients and what roll they play in our deodorant to keep your underarms dry and smelling great.

Shameless Plug Alert:

Fancy Free, LLC. is the manufacturer of quality products for hair and skin. Our motto is "Keeping you chemical free." Visit our website, www.fancyfreellc.com, to see a full range of our products and services. Sign up for our mailing list to receive natural hair tips and stay up to date on sales and the latest happenings with Fancy Free.

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The Shea-M of It All

As a newly minted naturalista, I spent a lot of time AND money trying out different hair products. I could never find anything that got it quite right which is why I started making my own. However, Shea Moisture quickly became one of my staple products for shampooing and conditioning. So much so that I often recommend it to my Natural Hair Consult clients. It's relatively inexpensive and chemical free, right in line with the Fancy Free motto - Fancy and Free of Chemicals. The fact that it's owned by a black family was a plus. An awesome plus. A big plus. However, in 2015, a larger company, Bain Capital, became an investor to the family owned and run Shea Moisture. With big investors come new "visions" for the company. We know that. It never fails. BUT when loyal customers, black women, voiced their concerns about what the new investors meant for the company and products, Shea Moisture executives reassured us that nothing about Shea Moisture's core values would change. In fact, partnering with an investor allowed Shea Moisture to free up resources that gave them more freedom and capitol to invest in the community. So they said. The reality is, to grow as a company, you need more money to expand. Dassit. Dassall.

Now, when I saw the name "Bain", y'all know what I thought of, right? Bane, the villain in that last Batman movie. I'm just saying. And the fact that Mitt Romney is part owner of the company, a rich, white man.... I'm just trying to figure out how this conversation even started. Anyway, my experience in the corporate world is that no one cares about the people, only the bottom line. So let's see how this plays a role in this Shea Moisture ad fiasco.

Black women spend an average of $7.5 billion dollars every year on beauty products. Let that sink in. Seven. Point. Five. But what do people with money want? MORE MONEY!!! If we have loyalty from our black women, how do we expand our territory? Market to them. I'm sure that's how the board meeting went. And then the marketing team came up with that "interesting" campaign for hair products. And WE WENT AWF! Like, seriously. We get it. You want to expand, so you switch up your target audience but at what cost?

I started selling Fancy Free for Hair & Skin in March 2015 but I had been making it for myself since 2012. By summer 2015, I had an official logo, the Fancy Girl. A black girl, with big hair. She looks like me. She looks like my friends. She looks like a lot of the people who buy my products. My vision for Fancy Free is big.....YUGE - Donald Trump. In the beginning, I had some suggest I remove my beloved Fancy Girl to make it less ethnic. And it's true, when I'm out vending, some non-African Americans look at my banner and keep walking because they thinking it's not for them. However, the ones that try it, love it. They were not deterred by the brand of products that looks like it's not for them. They just wanted quality product. White isn't always right. African Americans rush to buy items that we never meant for us. Like, seriously, any shapely woman knows not to even try to fit into a pair of True Religion jeans. THEY WEREN'T MADE FOR US!!! Some designers have blatantly stated that they don't want black people wearing their clothes. They don't market to us. But we still buy for whatever reason.

I wish that the Shea Moisture executives had put their foot down at that meeting. I wish we didn't know that Shea Moisture thought that black women, who spend $7.5 billion dollars on beauty products, just wasn't enough for them. However, because we told them how we felt, they learned a valuable lesson and will tweak their approach. But....the damage is already done. I will still buy but only when I catch a B1G1 sale to combine with my coupons and can get it for next to nothing.

Shameless Plug Alert:

Fancy Free, LLC. is the manufacturer of quality products for hair and skin. Our motto is "Keeping you chemical free." Visit our website, www.fancyfreellc.com, to see a full range of our products and services. Sine up for our mailing list to receive natural hair tips and stay up to date on sales and the latest happenings with Fancy Free.

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The Emotional Roller Coaster of Entrepreneurship

One of my loves, who is actually the reason why I started blogging again after taking a couple years hiatus, started a meet up for black women entrepreneurs. I was very picky about how I spent my time because, well, I didn't have much to spare. However, since taking my jump, I'm more open to opportunities to network and get out of the house. I'm oucheah! Cuz ain't nobody gonna know about my product if I don't get out in deez streetz and tell them.

Anyway, the meet up was such a blessing. It was a protected space where we, black women, who always have to be strong and look like we have it together, could be vulnerable and express our needs. A few key takeaways were that:

• Entrepreneurship is lonely
• It is scientifically proven that human beings are designed to operate in a team

Let's start with the loneliness of it all, as I sit in my living room alone writing this blog. Yeah. It seems cool to have the freedom during the day to schedule things as I please. I don't have the constant interruptions of office mates and colleagues asking me dumb questions. However, that can backfire because I am alone with my thoughts, which leads to the next take a way.....

Human beings are designed to operate in a team. We are not meant to do things alone. It leads to the dreaded emotional roller coaster that comes with entrepreneurship. There are days when you feel like you can take over the world and get it all done. There are other days where it is all too much and you just wanna take a nap. Then there are the days that you feel like you aren't doing enough, that you are a complete loser, and you start to rethink your life choices. All because you're by yourself. I mean, look at some stories of people being stranded after some kind of accident. A group of people is more likely to survive than a single person in the exact same circumstances. Let that sink in.

So, even though I know all of that, I had a bad day this week. I did it too myself. It was not warranted. I started comparing my progress to someone else's. I wondered if I could make it happen. I wondered when my growth would reach it's tipping point. I wondered what I was doing wrong. Then I snapped out of it and gave myself some kudos, like my therapist taught me. After that, I had a conversation with a sister friend about being emotional. She reminded me of who I am and also reminded me of the source of those emotions *whispers* cuz she knows my real life. Then said "You'll be alright. Just keep swimming." She was right. I snapped out of it.

But then I had to talk about that roller coaster moment with someone who was at the meet up with me. My cousin, who is also my attorney. I hit her up and said "cousin confessions". LOL! I told her about my emotional roller coaster and what triggered it. We laughed at me for being "crazy" then we started talking about strategy and timelines. We had a few "ah ha" moments and felt good about Fancy Free when we ended the conversation.

The point is, who knows how long I would've been in that funk had I not reached out to my team to at

 least talk about it. Entrepreneurship is not easy. It takes a lot of mental tenacity to make it through each day with the growth, set backs, highs, and lows. Any success story has a team of people pushing the main character through. Your team does not have to be in the same industry, it's just important to have a safe place where you can be vulnerable and receive encouragement. 

In the end, I know that I made the right decision. My father and husband always remind me that the tough choice is usually the best choice and that nothing worth having will be easy to come by. 

Shameless Plug Alert:

Fancy Free, LLC. is the manufacturer of quality products for hair and skin. Our motto is "Keeping you chemical free." Visit our website, www.fancyfreellc.com, to see a full range of our products and services. Sine up for our mailing list to receive natural hair tips and stay up to date on sales and the latest happenings with Fancy Free.

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Desires of the Heart

Soooooo, I used to have time to blog regularly. Then I started a business. Then I had a baby. Then I went back to work. Then business started picking up. Life became crazy but the whole time, I was working on myself. Not just growing my business but growing as a person. Improving how I manage my time. Improving my relationships. Loving myself more. Not being so hard on myself. Reading more. Meditating. Eating better. I also began to grow out of things. Outgrow relationships. Outgrow activities. You get the point.

Fast forward to today. I have finally fully retired from healthcare to pursue my passion. And, also, allowing what has been chasing me my entire life to catch up to me. You see, I grew up in a salon. I feel like every woman in my family has a cosmetology license, including my mother. I even worked in a salon while in grad school and apprenticed under my mother but never took the exam. What some may see is a woman who started small, business picked up, opportunities are presenting, so I decided to go for it. What people don't know is that this was written. Business is picking up, so I need more space to manufacture. What will that space look like? Eventually, it will be a beauty salon. That's the 2 year plan. All that running from cosmetology has come full circle. LOL!

In college, even though my career path was not clear, I knew I did not want to work beyond the age of 35. At the time, I thought I would work a little bit and then my husband would take care of me. LOL! I mean, my mother is a stay at home mom, why can't I be one too? No one knew this. I never shared it with my husband. Why? Well, life happens. Reality hits you. I assumed that we could not sustain our lifestyle on one salary, so my intention was to stay in healthcare until I was retirement age. While I had reached my career goals by the age of 30, I thought I'd develop new ones for healthcare related advancement in my career. Nope. That's not what happened. Once I mastered my job function, I was looking for a new challenge. This was right around the time when I began my journey in multilevel marketing.

Say what you want about multilevel marketing, but for me, it was an eye opener. I was open minded
and I realized how powerful I really am. I learned about myself. I realized that sitting in a windowless office, tucked away in the corner of a blood bank was not what Jehovah intended for me. I thought that multilevel marketing would be my ticket to a Fancy Free life but it didn't work out that way. Turned out that Fancy Free was my ticket. It had been right under my nose for about 2 years. I started selling the hair product. More and more women were scheduling natural hair consults. Fancy Free business was picking up. 500% growth in my second year of business. Those numbers happened during a year where I was working on a HUGE project at work, pregnant, oh yeah, and had a baby. This all got me thinking. If I grew this much with wishy washy, inconsistent marketing, imagine what I could do if I focused all of my energy on Fancy Free. Endless possibilities. No limits.

So there it was, staring me in my face, my destiny. But how was I going to transition? Our household

budget included my, now half time, salary. Simple. Get out of debt. If we paid off all of our credit cards, we could afford to live off of my husband's salary. Simple. Not easy though. LOL! So we got to work. Scaled back on splurging. We were chopping that debt down, big time. The whole time, my work environment was becoming more miserable. Once my focus shifted from being a Specialist in Blood Bank to growing as a CEO, I no longer wanted to spend time blood banking. I wanted to be building Fancy Free. So EVERYTHING irritated me. It was time to go.

Once we set a date, that's when the magic began. You see, when you begin to walk in your purpose,
the flood gates open and everything works toward helping you receive the desires of your heart. Things lined up in a way that I couldn't have even imagined for myself. I never told my husband I wanted to retire by 35. I kept it close to my heart. Between Jehovah and I. But I was open and flexible. The silence while meditating let Him speak to me. I just listened. Now, here I am at 36 years old and retired. Only one year behind schedule. I mean, the Jews wandered in the wilderness for 40 years, so 1 year isn't so bad.

No, all of our debt isn't completely paid off but we're on our way. No, I don't have a building yet. But the reality is, all of your ducks are never going to line up the way you want them to before you take the "jump". Jehovah wants you to rely on Him and not your own understanding. When we humble ourselves, accept that there a lot of things that we just don't know, and actively seek guidance, things happen, BIG things happen.

What are the desires of your heart? Go after them with all you've got. There is nothing you can't do once you've made up your mind.

Shameless plug alert:
Fancy Free, LLC. is the manufacturer of quality products for hair and skin. Our motto is "Keeping you chemical free." Visit our website, www.fancyfreellc.com, to see a full range of our products and services. Sine up for our mailing list to receive natural hair tips and stay up to date on sales and the latest happenings with Fancy Free.

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Laws Of Power

I dealt with much internal turmoil in the first half of 2016. How did I get there? I'm a reasonable person. A forgiving person. A generous person. Maybe that's how. I allowed someone who had hurt me repeatedly back in to my life. Not without hesitation but I feel like we all make mistakes and we all grow from our missteps. I mean, if someone has the courage to come to me, admit how they were wrong, and apologize, who am I to continue to shut them out?

Fast forward to September 2015, I found myself in a position where I had been betrayed by the person. Betrayed and hurt again. But this time, I wasn't surprised by these antics. After all, I invited them in. EYE put myself in the position. I trusted again when I shouldn't have. I learned a tough lesson that cost me. Not only time but money as well.

I know that I can't expect everyone to treat me the way I'd like to be treated. I know everyone wasn't raised the same, but to be slapped in the face with that reality by someone who has been in your house, breaking bread with your family is tough. I had literally been defeated because I wasn't dealing with honest and reasonable person but, deep down, I knew I wouldn't have felt any resolve even if I had won. I typically have no problem cutting people and situations off with the swiftness but this situation really bothered me. I couldn't figure out what the REAL issue. So, I did what I always do. In true scientist fashion, I went to gather data from everyone who knew the details.

I started by immediately re-listening to "The 48 Laws of Power". I would say reading but I've read it already so I listen to it on YouTube while in my office. Multi-tasking. LOL! After listening, I realized what I did wrong and how the situation could've been handled differently for a more positive outcome. When I say positive, I mean, how I could've gotten what I wanted. *shrugs* No shame. The lessons taught in "The 48 Laws Of Power" teach that while you have to be strategic in your actions, sometimes you also have to humble yourself and lose a battle or two in order to win the war. So, I checked myself. It didn't have to end that way but I was more focused on what I thought was right instead of by any means necessary in order to win. BOOM!

Then I talked about it in therapy because knowing how I could've handled the situation differently still didn't fix that nagging feeling. Like, why did this bother me so badly if I saw it coming eventually? Well, my therapist was able to get me to see how I was tying this situation into some other unsettling relationships in my life. It was my "lightbulb" moment. Once I figured that out, I was able to drop that nagging feeling like a hot potato. The biggest weight was lifted from me. It was literally like storm clouds cleared the sky and the sun came shining through, complete with a rainbow and angels singing.

This situation taught me some valuable lessons about myself and human nature. Sometimes people just don't like you. Don't try to figure it out. Their poor taste doesn't diminish your value. It doesn't make you a bad person, a bad friend, a bad sister, a bad mother, a bad daughter, a bad wife.....none of that stuff. Sometimes you don't get closure and you have to be okay with that. Leave it alone. Going back will only result in more hurt. Sometimes you just have to take the gut punches in order to get what you want. Man up. Take it.

That's it. That's all.

That "Ah Ha!" Moment

My life has become so jam packed that I no longer have time to sit down and read. So I consolidate activities. I listen to books while I'm doing activities that I'd normally require music. Exercising, folding laundry, whipping shea, etc. Right now, I'm listening to Russell Simmon's book, Super Rich. He talks about meditation and becoming a business yogi and it has me doing some serious self evaluation. Yes, I am "Fancy". How'd I get that name anyway? To me, I'm just a hippie who is very particular about some things and does not care about most other things. LOL! Where am I going with my business ventures? What direction am I taking my professional life? I do what I do because I'm good at it, not necessarily because I have a burning passion for it.

At 21 years old, I decided that I'd be a blood bank boss. I did the training, got the certifications and BOOM! By 29 years old, I had accomplished that goal. I perfected blood bank bossing by the age of 32 and was ready to move on to another challenge.What's next?

Direct sales. Direct sales is AWESOME SAUCE!!! But only if you're up for a challenge. It requires a hell of a lot of personal growth. Only the strong make it to the other side. The other side being residual income. You also have to inspire that in other people who may not be ready in order to maintain and grow your team, which also maintains and grows your income. What I got out of it? I learned that I am an entrepreneur at heart. I am a creative. As an employee, I need flexibility in order to flourish. I learned that I will see exponential growth and feel success beyond my wildest imagination if I put the same passion and consistency that I put into managing a blood bank behind my own product. My imagination does not have any limitations. EYE have the power to make what I visualize in my head into a reality. The personal development required to be successful in direct sales helps you see that if you can believe it, it can be yours. I visualized my successes in my career. Direct sales got me visualizing what success as "Fancy Free" looks like and it looks like a lot of time in the pool or a beach. Nothing too fancy but definitely free.

The words of "Super Rich" made me realize that I already have it all. I already have it all. I am enjoying the process of becoming. In becoming a business yogi. In becoming a mother. In becoming a wife. Just becoming better all around. I have material success and titles but I know that titles do not define me. As a matter of fact, whenever I'm engaged in a conversation that starts with "So, what do you do?", I usually say I'm a stripper or wet nurse. In my mind, if the first thing you're asking me when we meet is about my line of work and we're not in a work environment, I don't necessarily want to talk to you anyway. In my mind, we ain't got nothing in common. LOL! Now I'm ready to take this life to another level by being even more focused and operating on an even higher level of consciousness.

With that being said, I did a self check. I looked at my proverbial stove. All of the burners are going. I'm turning the heat down on 3 of the 4 burners and turning it up on just one. Everything else will have to blend in with that thing. If it doesn't mesh with my vision, I ain't doing it. I'm sooooo excited about this new clarity. I wasn't sure what was holding me back from going all in. Now I realize it was because I was unsure about something. Now that I'm sure, I'm going for it. Full steam ahead.

It's so amazing what reflection and self correction can do for your life. The day that I had this moment, I had an opportunity waiting  for me in my inbox. If this is not affirmation, I don't know what is. When you chase something, it will run away. When embrace your purpose and your passion, you will attract your heart's desires.

The Fancy Life just keeps getting better.

Twelve Weeks A......Mom

I often find myself stopping in the middle of whatever I'm doing just to stare at my son. If he's awake, I'll talk to him, read to him, sing to him. If he's sleeping, I'll stare at him, rub his cheeks, kiss on him, rub his head. To me, he's perfect. A perfect combination of his father and I. A perfect culmination of what my life has become.

Adjusting to life with my perfect little prince has been interesting. I'm learning a lot about myself. I don't care about the same things I used to care about. All I want to do now is make sure he gets every opportunity I had and more. But I'm also struggling to find balance. Taking care of a newborn is VERY time consuming and I'm also working toward building a financial portfolio. I want to leave him with a legacy not bills.

Me trying to "find balance" is me saying I need to manage my time better. When I say "I don't have time." now, it means something completely different than when I used to say it a year ago. A year ago, it meant more so "I can't be bothered". LOL! You know, being shady. But now, I really just don't have time. I have stuff to do. I'm constantly moving. Straightening the house. Doing laundry. Running errands. Making shea. Shipping shea. Talking to people about Thrive. Looking for properties to invest in. And allllll of those things come AFTER I perform wife and mother duties. Because, to me, those things are most important.

You see, I am blessed with a very supportive husband who has enough faith in my abilities to agree for me to give up my full time salary so that I can spend more time working on my entrepreneurial ventures and raise our son. The last thing I want to do is make him feel like I don't have time for him. And my son. He's such a joy. I really just want to play with him all day but I have to "adult" also.

In short, I've been a mother for 12 weeks and my whole world has been turned upside down. I couldn't be happier with the way my life is set up. I find myself close to Beyonce "I'm so blessed" tears. But I'm a thug so I don't cry. LOL! I'm focused on conquering time management and balance while I try to fit everything I need to do in between snuggling and loving on my son and husband.